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Third Personality

by Garrett DeBell

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1.
Make Believe 03:14
" I read it In a Letter Today It was addressed with my name Want to know what to believe? Go ahead and sign up for free Well Believing is in season Give me one good reason why its gotta be Jesus or something deep down beneath us and if I'd just follow the rules I would't have to play such a fool But I'm not terrified of anything No others, no lovers, no trouble they bring One Idea is enough for some Something quick, a book to steal from It's the diamonds that make you feel dumb no sense in trying when you're already done. There's not a place for peace In the System of belief Taking more than what you mean In the system of belief Aggression in the microtones Suppression of our microphones Can't get through the saturation My own ideas are a complication Oh what should I believe? Maybe it's all about me I believe There's not a place for peace In the system of belief Taking more than what you mean In the system of belief"
2.
When you think about leaving where do you go? Can you take yourself serious? Or was it all for show I know The Water is toxic and the outside obnoxious but I still call it home I know, we could go all we gotta do is drive, all we gotta do is drive drive drive away from here but I only got a bike
3.
"We're in the same movement, it can feel my blood. What secrets do they tell, that I refuse to share? Wearing the same shoes, speaking in tongues. One is a liar, and the other is numb Tret'i lichnosti I'm living in the third Personality Relying on the web, we created together Like an open book, the same story forever I can't turn the switch on, I prefer auto pilot It's gotten too hard to try, they'll do it for me Tret'i lichnosti I'm living in the third Personality"
4.
In Excess 03:33
"He never learned how to build only how to throw it away After everything is torn apart They'll do it again Now ya don't have to ruin it It was there before you were Those walls meant no harm Yet the child is still gone Well he went ahead and ran Living like a ghost none the less I can't stand to be him he's obsessed with death They had to get out of here No room left to understand The knots get more tangled In his make believe land Now ya don't have to ruin it It was there before you were Those walls meant no harm Yet the child is still gone. Well he went ahead and ran Living like a ghost none the less I can't stand to be him he's obsessed with death It's inaccessible, to the stereo It's in excess It's In excess excess, excess, excess, excess
5.
Can you tell me the speed of dark? or what it's like to swim the with sharks? I've been thinking outside the bloc. I am a happening inside the flock. and I'm leaving you, Intentionally Blank They might call me a psycho ceramic I'm just an animal with unnatural dynamics If you read the milk crate, I am a thief If that's what we're in for, what a relief. and I'm leaving you, intentionally blank.
6.
Repitition 03:59
"They were right to say it's stunning. Sun beams on the Rainbow Door I'm Ill in the motion. My lights are on the floor White Knuckles will bring me here. Anger sharing the path of fear. Missing the guts it's said. Moxie gets a 3 out of 10 That's how we started this, getting the same results. Now I understand the smokers, A utensil in each hand. I'm Picking up the rollies again. The Cutter waits to be lit. Long is a life in hiding. Im Possible in the mind. Repetition, Stops the shake I'm living in a complex. The same flat year after year Jaws moving in the same way. Catching up after the egg. Fresh ties keep them from coming back, back from the dead Try to fix all the problems, Forgotten by everyone but you. Your memories wrapped in plastic, We make a time of it Give it the attention, like the clocks I wished for In matters of polarity, enough waiting patiently long is a life in hiding, I'm possible in the mind. Repetition, stops the shake."

about

"Third Personality" is a reference to dissociation and experiencing duality due to trauma and unregulated or obscured emotions. Seeing oneself in "third person." This could be shortly before or after speaking or a whole run of ideations while the brain and body experiences a metaphorical immobilization. The third person pushes its own agenda offering inaccurate images of behavior, self reflection, space, and reception. The third person offers little solutions leaving the victim alienated, hopeless, bored, preoccupied, lonely and lost in fantasies that are much more detailed and horrifying than the reality of their base. The third person isn't always detectable sometimes showing itself in retrospect, the strange inability to remember what was just said to you, or an overwhelming feeling of ending ones own life.

If anyone experiences the push and pull of a malformed sense of self I wish for you to know you aren't alone. Many kinds of experiences can lead here, it's very tricky. Sending out my love.

These are danceable haunted tunes recorded over this year that sound well past their half life. The sonic stage exists in a small reflective box without windows. Synths clang and warp, guitars jab and stutter. Slowed down tape bring out the ghosts lingering inside these machines. Truly a studio composition, the material fed bends and dissolves into something that feels like a bygone artifact.

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released May 13, 2021

Written and recorded at "The Cubicle" by Garrett DeBell

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Garrett DeBell New Orleans, Louisiana

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